By Morris Wambua

It’s yet another dreary, rainy weekend, and the clouds are crying their hearts out, as if they understand your feelings of cold and loneliness.

You find yourself staring out the window, fogging up the glass with your breath, clutching a steaming cup of tea as warmth seeps into your chilly bones. Each raindrop falls like a tear from the
heavens, mirroring the sadness swelling in your heart.

As you scroll through your phone, you become caught in a web of envy and self-reflection.

On your phone, notifications trickle endlessly, punctuating the silence of your otherwise tranquil bedsitter, or let's call it studio apartment, shattering it with the latest updates from social media.

Photos of couples cozying up under colorful umbrellas flood your feed. They are laughing, their eyes sparkling as they share a moment that feels so far from your reality.

One couple perches on a café, graciously sipping foamy cappuccino; their smiles bright enough to light up even the dreariest of days.

Another pair has posted an artistic shot of intertwined hands, fingers clasped in a way that speaks of promises and commitments.

Then there is you, rolled up in a white duvet, watching life unfold from a distance, wondering if the cold creeping into your bones is a physical reaction to the chill in the air or the jealousy pitching tents in your heart.

Your mind races with the onslaught of feelings that come with scrolling through Instagram.

“I can do better!” you think, the words echoing like an anthem in your head.

Each photo feels like a tiny dagger, aimed straight at your heart.

You can’t help but imagine the exquisite lives these couples lead, filled with candle-lit dinners and spontaneous weekend trips, where their only worry is deciding whether to take the scenic route or grab another slice of cake.

Maybe, some of those who seem to be doing well are evictees of your tired heart. You feel the weight, literally.

All the while, your Saturday has consisted of navigating the perils of leftover takeout and wondering if it’s too late to start a new Netflix series.

The self-pity rises within you like the tide, and you begin to spiral down the rabbit hole of comparisons.

And then—WHAM!—there it is, yet another engagement post.

You roll your eyes, but the bitterness creeps in, like the rainwater that slowly seeps through your doorstep. Your feelings aren’t just hurt; they’re waterlogged, much like your kitchen after you left the windows open all night.

Each new notification is a reminder that you are still single, and the world is moving forward without you, or so it seems.

You take a deep breath, trying to rein in the tumult of emotions swirling inside you. But let’s
be real: that might not be the best choice.

Self-Reflection Amidst Raindrops

Before you wipe your tears, allow me to whisper a little truth: maybe the current version of you is not yet fit to be someone’s spouse.

Shocking, I know!

But hear me out.

Maybe, just maybe, the "you" who spends Saturday binge-watching Netflix in pajamas, hair askew and half-eaten popcorn strewn about like the remnants of a battle fought in solitude, might not quite be ready for that quality man or woman you've been praying for.

You know the one—the guy with the steady job, the quiet confidence, and a jawline that could cut through steel; or the woman with ambition, kindness, and a grace that leaves you speechless every time she walks into a room.

You long for a relationship that feels like a scene from a romantic comedy, not just a blurry photo on someone’s Instagram feed.

You want to marry a quality human being, not just any wheelbarrow that’s wheeled down the aisle, right?

Truth is, the wheelbarrows of life are everywhere, ready to roll into your heart if you aren’t careful and if you're Kenyan, you just know too well, what a wheelbarrow is capable of becoming.

Yes, you sing in the choir like an angel, and your midnight prayers shake the heavens.

Allow me to clap for you for all that.

But...

Are you really going to marry a "born-again problem" just because they shouted the loudest "Amen" at Bible study last week? (No shade—just facts.)

Some of y’all are out here falling for faith-filled wheelbarrows and calling it destiny.

Honey, just because they can recite scripture doesn’t mean they’ll solve your financial or emotional crises. You don’t want to be that person clinging to the hope that faith alone will fix everything.

The Quest for Self-Improvement

Speaking of value, let’s get into the nitty-gritty of self-improvement.

Stop waiting for that "right person" to complete you—build yourself! This rainy weekend isn’t here to drown your dreams; it’s giving you time to reflect on your personal growth.

Maybe it’s time to pick up a book, learn a new skill, or re-evaluate why your last relationship ended over an argument about who sent the last text message.

Imagine the glorious transformation that could happen if you directed your energies into developing a hobby or pursuing a passion that excites you.

Whether it's painting, dancing, or even learning how to bake a soufflé, these pursuits will not only fill your time but also add layers to your personality.

When the day comes that you finally meet your match, you want to be able to say, “Yes, I am a well-rounded individual, ready to share my life with you, not just fill the emptiness in my heart.”

Picture yourself a few months down the line, stepping into a new coffee shop, perhaps one you’ve never been to before. You’re radiant, armed with stories of your newfound adventures.

There’s a spark in your eye that says, “I am happy, fulfilled, and quite busy with my own fabulous life.”

That’s when God might just drop you into the VIP section of life—right there, in the café, where quality men and women with vision and purpose hang out, sipping artisanal coffee and discussing world travel.

No more settling for wheelbarrows when you can roll with Ferraris!

Diving into the Deep End of Personal Growth

The rain continues to patter against your window, but instead of letting it drag you down, think of it as a cleansing. Let it wash away the remnants of self-doubt, inadequacy, and comparisons.

Step outside, breathe in the fresh air mixed with that distinctive earthy aroma that only comes after rain. Feel the droplets kiss your skin like a gentle reminder of life’s beauty and unpredictability.

Get comfortable with discomfort.

Challenge yourself.

Take a class, join a club, or volunteer for a cause you’re passionate about. These experiences will not only enrich your life but will also put you in contact with people who share your values.

Who knows?

You might even find your future partner while planting trees or learning to salsa dance!

Finding Your Worth Beyond Relationships

Your worth should never hinge on someone else's perception of you.

Instead, build a fortress of self-esteem so high that it could withstand any storm, even those brought by social media.

You’re not just another profile picture in the crowd; you are a vibrant individual with dreams, aspirations, and a unique story to tell.

Own that narrative!

Let your life be a series of chapters filled with adventures, triumphs, and yes, even the occasional misadventure. Those moments shape who you are, adding depth and character to your life story.

Now, let’s talk about boundaries.

Set them high!

Protect your heart from the wheelbarrows that want to come rolling in. A relationship should enhance your life, not serve as a crutch to help you walk through your days. If you find yourself in a situation where your partner doesn’t respect your personal space or undermines your worth, it’s time to reevaluate.

Relationships should be built on mutual respect, growth, and shared values—not on one person bearing the weight of the other’s unresolved issues.

A Little Humor Goes a Long Way

While you’re on this journey of self-improvement, don’t forget to laugh!

Humor is one of life’s greatest treasures. It can transform a bad day into a comical escapade.

Imagine sharing your misadventures with a potential partner: “So there I was, tripping over my own two feet in the middle of a dance class, and who should catch me but the instructor himself!

He laughed so hard, I thought I might just die of embarrassment, but hey, we shared a good chuckle, and now I have an awesome story to tell!”

Humor brings people together. It bridges gaps and fosters connections. A great sense of humor is often cited as one of the most attractive qualities in a partner.

So go ahead, embrace your quirks, share your awkward moments, and don’t take yourself too seriously.

So, stop refreshing your social media feed and letting envy run amok in your soul.

Start investing in you!

The rain may be pouring, but this is the perfect time to sow seeds of self-worth, discipline, and character.

Think of yourself as a garden waiting to bloom, and it requires care and attention to flourish. You’ll come out of this drizzle shining so bright, no more falling for the next “hallelujah!” that rolls in like thunder but leaves your life in a storm.

Picture the future you, strolling through life with confidence, joy radiating from within.

The wheelbarrows of yesterday are now just a memory, a lesson learned.

The world is your oyster, and you are ready to meet someone who complements your journey, who inspires you, and who challenges you to grow even further.

No more settling for the mediocre.

You deserve the extraordinary.

Creating Your Own Love Story

I have to leave you alone for now.

But before I go, keep the wheelbarrows where they belong: in the garden shed.

Your love story is still being written, and you are the author.

As you take this time for self-discovery, remember that you are not just waiting for someone to come into your life.

You are actively crafting the best version of yourself, preparing for the kind of love that aligns with your growth.

Embrace the rain, the quiet moments, and the journey ahead. They are all pieces of your grand narrative, building toward a future filled with love, laughter, and companionship. And when the time is right, you will be ready to meet someone who sees your worth and values you for the incredible person you have become.

Let the wheelbarrows roll away, and let the journey to self-love and improvement begin.

The world is waiting, and so is your love story.

As the rain continues to fall, let it be a gentle reminder that your time to shine is just around the corner.

Mpendwa, pokea nyota ya ndoa, sema amina mwanangu!